All the single ladies, all the single ladies… now put your hands UP!
Ok, our single Blissers, this one is for YOU. We need to have a little chat for a sec.
Help Us Out Here
As women in long-term relationships, we’ve obviously been out of the dating game for quite a while. However, we’ve got several friends that are still single and hear tidbits about the dating scene. There’s one thing in particular that neither one of us can wrap our heads around: TINDER.
According to Wikipedia, Tinder is “a location-based social search mobile app that facilitates communications between mutually interested users, allowing matched users to chat. This app is most commonly used as a dating app or hookup app.”
So basically, if you find someone attractive, you swipe right. If you don’t, you swipe left.
Call us old fashioned, but…
Whatever happened to good old fashioned courting?? Finding someone while out at the grocery store, the bookstore, even a bar, and then pursuing him/her, having some conversations, and then going out on an actual date?
In our opinions, people are getting a wee bit too comfortable with hardly ever having to have face-to-face interactions anymore! Everything is virtual so people can hide behind their computer screens and pretend they’re the people they want to be versus the people they really are.
You’re fabulous just as you are, quirks and all. If someone can’t handle that, it’s his/her loss! NEXT!
Shallowness, Insecurities, and Fakeness… Oh My!
Apps like Tinder, although seemingly useful in some situations, are only adding to the rampant insecurities that everyone feels these days. Don’t you think?
Say you go a week and no one has “swiped right,” isn’t that a blow to your self-esteem? This app is something that introduces people solely based on what they look like. Believe it or not, looks aren’t everything. Granted, you have to be attracted to a person to make a relationship actually work, but there’s so much more to generating feelings of attraction than a quick glance at a carefully-selected photo.
A Much Smaller World
The internet is a beautiful thing. It has allowed the world to become so much smaller by instantaneously connecting us to others regardless of their physical distance. In a second, we could chat with a stranger in China or a relative in Turkey. We can see things that were previously only described to us by those that had actually stepped foot in foreign lands. We can shop for literally anything from the comfort of our couches and have it delivered to our home from the store selling it in Taiwan. It’s a remarkable thing!
But there’s a negative here too. People forget how important actual human interaction is. No one likes to talk anymore; it’s always texting. People are so open and brazen when it comes to commenting on social media because they don’t have to deal with the emotional responses their words elicit. It’s a quality too often found in people today, and frankly, we think it is a bummer it has infiltrated the dating world. People become insensitive and lack compassion towards others. It is easy to remain obliviously disconnected behind a screen.
Don’t Reduce Yourself to a Freaking Swipe
Looking for a quick hook-up that’s essentially no-strings-attached? Or are you proudly owning your sexuality and adding a few folks to your ho-tation? Tinder seems right up your alley then!
But you sweet ladies out there that are secretly hoping for more, the tender-hearted Tinderellas, please do yourself a favor and think about avoiding apps like this unless you’re fully prepared for the ramifications that may come to your psyche when all those that look don’t “swipe right.” We have definitely heard some beautiful Tinderly-Ever-After Tales that resulted in long term relationships, marriage, and beautiful babies, but that doesn’t seem to be the norm from what we’ve heard and seen. You are fabulous and we are sure that a good catch is on his/her way to you.
In the meantime, enjoy that single life and enjoy yourself! You know what you can bring to a relationship, so make sure you’re bringing all that goodness to yourself. Don’t force yourself into a Tinder norm if it doesn’t make sense for you.
Know your worth, be conscientious of others, and remind yourself to confidently Decide Bliss.